7 Reasons Some Pastors Don’t Trust Church Members

In the past, I’ve written on 10 Reasons Church Members Don’t Trust Pastors and 10 Characteristics of Pastors I’ve Trusted. What I haven’t done is talk about why some pastors don’t trust church members. So, here are my thoughts based on my work with pastors over the years:

1. Someone has betrayed them in the past. And, it takes only one such experience to begin distrusting others—especially if their family has been wounded in the process. I suspect this issue is the primary one for pastors who don’t trust church members. 
2. They hear church members talk about each other behind backs. Some pastors just assume—rightly so, in many cases—that the same people who gossip about other members will also gossip about their pastor. 
3. A professor, role model, or mentor encouraged them never to trust church members. Typically, leaders reach that conclusion when they’ve been burned personally in the past—but they don’t always tell that part of the story. Students and young pastors simply take their advice because they trust them. 
4. They’ve seen too many church members leave the church without having a conversation with the leaders. That kind of departure means closure never really happens, and the pastor is left wondering what’s up. The pastor then begins to wonder about every attender who misses church for more than a few consecutive weeks. 
5. The pastors have dealt with the moral failure of a long-term church member everyone believed was powerfully righteous. “If that member was deceiving us,” the pastor thinks, “how can I trust anyone?” 
6. In many cases, the pastor knows how little some members give to the church financially. I’ve discussed previously whether pastors should know this information, but those who do know must be prepared to react well to what they learn. When they learn that some church leaders give little to the church, they struggle trusting other members. 
7. They know some members who claim to be Christian on Sunday but live quite differently the rest of the week. Hypocrisy among the members naturally breeds distrust among the pastors—particularly among pastors who are not willing to confront members or utilize church members. Ignoring the situation hardly helps the trust issue. 

Sometimes it’s a combination of these issues that creates distrust in pastors. What would you add?