I wasn’t raised in a Christian home, so I’ve not seen a Christian marriage up close. For that reason, I continually watch other Christian men so I can learn how to be a better husband. I’m not the husband I want to be, but I do have role models who challenge me in so many areas:
- Scheduling a regular date night. Usually, that date night is weekly, though some go out every other week.
- Scheduling “Daddy/son/daughter” nights. Few things please a wife and mom like a daddy who prioritizes and loves his children.
- Intentionally setting aside time to talk . . . and more specifically, to listen. Most men aren’t good at being quiet and paying attention to someone else—including our spouse. The best husbands I know have changed that pattern.
- Going to bed at the same time as their spouse. That’s not always easy, but every man I know who’s made this commitment says it was an invaluable change.
- Respecting and honoring their spouse in public. Never have I heard any of these men belittle their wives in public.
- Talking before planning. They include their family responsibilities in any calendaring conversation, no matter how busy they may be.
- Praying with their spouse and children. The best husbands I know pray daily with their family. The prayer may be really brief, but it happens nonetheless.
- Holding hands. It’s a simple act, but it says, “I’m glad you’re with me, I want to be near you, and I’m watching over you.”
- Working diligently and wisely. These husbands work hard to provide for their families, but they also know how to balance family and work time.
- Keeping their word. They make no promises they can’t keep, and they keep every promise they make. They are men of integrity.
- Loving the Lord. The best husbands I know genuinely follow Christ.
I read this list, and I realize I have more work to do than I thought. Pray with me that I’ll be a good husband.
Southern NH, USA
Yes, thanks for these excellent reminders. After 43 years, I still need such a list!