10 Church Member Contradictions That Frustrate Pastors

Some church members are walking contradictions, and they frustrate church pastors and leaders. Here are some of them:

  1. Those who point out problems, but refuse to be part of the solution. They’re experts at seeing the wrong, but they have no interest in helping fix the problem.
  2. Those who attend only occasionally, but seem to know all the “stuff” going on. You’d think they’d be out of the loop, but not necessarily.  
  3. Those who give, but threaten to pull their giving every time they don’t like something. In that case, they’re not really giving; they’re using their dollars as a weapon.
  4. Those who quote the Bible regularly, but never quite accurately. Some of us could write a book on misquoted Bible verses, often quoted only to support an argument.
  5. Those who see only the negative in the present but remember only the positive in the past. Somehow, they’ve developed new good memories of the things they complained about in the past.
  6. Those who complain because the church isn’t growing, but haven’t shared Christ or invited anyone to church in years. They see it as somebody else’s responsibility to reach the community.
  7. Those who lead publicly, but live a different life privately. Sometimes that life isn’t even so private, actually. Too many churches allow this person to keep serving too long.
  8. Those who talk about the importance of a church family even while they church hop. They seem to see family as important only as long as things go their way. 
  9. Those who welcome a new pastor with “great” ideas until that pastor actually tries to implement those ideas. What they affirmed in the “dating” stage, they reject after the honeymoon is over.
  10. Those who say Jesus loves everybody, but want only people like them in the church. Apparently, they think they can love others from a distance and be like Jesus.

Here’s the challenging part of this post, though: we pastors are called to love everybody, including the walking contradictions in our congregations. Our loving consistency for all is a witness of the gospel. 

What other contradictions would you add to this list? If you recommend an addition, be sure to pray first for those who come to mind. 


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